Finishing at Junior High School (Permanently)

I had my last class with my 3rd years the other day.  It’s time they leave the nest and try their wings in other skies.  But this mother goose isn’t going to be staying at home feeling sorry for herself collecting fresh twigs for another litter of puppies - oh no - I too am moving on.  The same time that they will be starting high school, I will be starting with yet another company (my third in the 2.5 years I’ve been in Japan), this time going for the more intimate, private-lesson line of work.  (Don't let the 'mother goose' comment confuse you, I still am, last time I checked, a heterosexual male completely comfortable with his sexuality and inability to bear children.)

I really am going to miss some of the little bastards and bastardets though - some of them were quite amusing.  But it’s like what I imagine parenthood to be:  kids are great at first, they’re cute and amusing, you treasure little moments like their first steps or, in my case, the first time they curse, but when you have to see them every day, when they simply refuse to be reasonable and behave like a respectable, logical grownup, the charm sort of wears off.

              The first time they curse you off you feel proud, like you taught them something useful, but when they continue to do it every time they see you, it stops being funny at some point.  (Though usually I still find it pretty funny and laugh in spite of myself.)  Here are some of my favorite examples:

-Kmoto-kun, one of the star soccer players, communicates with me solely by looking up dirty words in his spare time and telling them to me, i.e. blowjob, cock, pussy,“six-nine.”

-Others, with a larger vocabulary, are more creative.  I recently had a slight problem with my Visa and while out of work for a spell one of my students, whom I have given the English name ‘Ricky,’ poked his head out of the classroom for a second to inform my replacement (also my boss) that I was an idiot.  “Peter is an idiot.” he said - a word I taught him early in the year that he has gotten a lot of use out of.

-The same student wrote an example sentence for the phrase, “spend time,” in a composition assignment by saying he spent time at my girlfriend’s house.  (Telling my students about my girlfriend has come back to haunt me on numerous occasions.)

-Perhaps I should have made myself into more of an authority figure, but my own distaste for authority figures makes me hesitate in those types of situations.  Recently I was playing volleyball with a bunch of my students with a beach ball we found in the International Room during cleaning time and a Japanese teacher came into the room and yelled at us.  Of course he had directed it at the students but I couldn’t help thinking that I was not completely innocent in the matter, if not completely to blame.

-While the girls don’t curse me off, they have found other ways to joke with me in insulting ways.  A couple of girls have taken to making note of my thinning hair and again I have given them positive reinforcement for potentially disrespectful behavior by laughing and feigning hurt feelings.

-I also taught some of my 1^st years some words that are not on the basic curriculum that they too have taken to use as amusing insults and forms of disrespect.  While not as offensive as some of the words I’ve taught the older kids, the little pricks certainly make due.  Some of their favorite words are “ridiculous,” “fool,” “crazy,” and the phrase, “Go away.”  The sole verbal interaction I have with one of the little shits is him saying, “Come here.” to inevitably be immediately followed by, “Go away.”  It is progress, nevertheless, because for most of the year we had had the same kind of relationship but with only hand gestures.

-Two of the second years have grown comfortable enough around me that they feel no embarrassment in grabbing at my ass and privates.  Usually I am able to fend them off but every so often they get a nice handful.  This is a practice among Japanese boys and their friends that I will never be able to get on board with.

Yes, we have had some pretty good times.  I took this photo a couple of weeks ago as a memento.  It had happened quite naturally and spontaneously during the typical cleaning-time routine.  Even the writing on the blackboard behind them, written by Kmoto-kun (on the right), required no special preparation.